Day 11

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January 8, 2013 by jannie123

I have been doing really well. I’m excited for my move and I am focusing on all the decoration ideas. I am looking for cheap ways to decorate my new home. 🙂  At first, I was worried that my new home is going to be empty and sad without a man…. Well, now I have decided that I can be just as happy on my own. I don’t have to cater to what other people want for MY home. I don’t have to share and I can invite whomever I want to my place. I can be the boss and do WHATEVER I WANT. hehe. That’s pretty exciting.

Looking back, I was feeling sad at first, but now I am slowly feeling anger…. I hate him. I really F*cking hate him. He was terrible to me. I’m starting to see all that he had done to me was nothing. Deep down, I still want him to change and apologize for everything hurtful thing that he’d done for me. But I don’t think I can expect him to just show up at my door one day as a changed man, can I? Maybe in years he will change, but I’m not gonna wait around feeling miserable for him. Do I want him back in my life…? Not unless he changes. I’m not closing all doors, but I’m not holding my breath for him.

It’s not right that i’m even thinking about him… hopefully I don’t have to think of him anymore soon….




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